Sorry for the delay in posting. I’ve just been stuck in June and July. I’ve been very vocal about dealing with depression. While dealing with that, here comes anxiety. I just started working as someone’s part time assistant. I didn’t realize how traumatized I was from my last boss. Every day is a struggle and I have to calm myself down from panic attacks.
This is about becoming unstuck. The feeling of “stuck” is a combination of negative emotions. You feel upset, disappointed, angry, depressed and helpless. Feeling stuck just adds to anxiety and depression that you were already feeling. Sometimes it feels like a never ending cycle.
Many times, moments that seem like opportunities drift my way, but then the opportunities turn out to be negative experiences. Those experiences gave way to frequent headaches and laryngitis from allowing the negative energy of those “opportunities” to consume me.
- Don’t Quit Yet. Reach Out for Help.
We all have goals that we want to achieve, but when things aren’t going your way, sometimes you want to quit. Last month, I was ready to search for a full-time job, instead of trying to build my business, until I talked to Sumaiyah and Dr. Washington. When you feel alone on top of feeling stuck, the best thing can be reaching out to a trusted source. For me, it was speaking to someone who is currently a speaker or has their own business.
- Take Care of Yourself.
If you’ve been following For Colored Girls Who Lead on Facebook or Instagram, then you know every Friday is Self-Care Friday. If you become stuck, you might forget to care of yourself. I began Self-Care Friday to remind people, myself included, to promote looking after yourself. Self-care does not have to be complicated. I like to meditate at least 2-3 times a week. A lot of people find meditation to be intimidating, but there are helpful guides on websites like YouTube to help you.
When I am stuck, it seems like a negative cloud starts to follow me around. Gratitude seems like the last thing that I would be thinking about, but making a gratitude list actually puts things into perspective. I may not be wealthy with the job I have, but I love being able to pick my boys up from school everyday. My 6-year old runs down the steps and jumps into my arms. I started a GoFundMe to purchase feminine hygiene products for homeless women which is something I am very excited about doing. Helping other people has put things into perspective. I do not have everything that I want, but my basic needs are met daily. Keeping a gratitude list has made me realize that sometimes lessons and blessings come wrapped in sandpaper. At first the situation might seem impossible, but anything you can dream is possible.
- Make a Move.
Nike says it best: “Just Do It.” It is a simple motto, but how can I get unstuck if I sit around doing nothing? If I act like my body is stuck to my couch then I can’t move forward. Dreams without action are unachievable. In 2015, I wrote and published my first book. Since then everyone has been asking me, “When are you going to write your second book?” Everyone gets the same answer, “Soon”. Being stuck means you never know when you’ll become unstuck until you do something about it. While I haven’t gotten too far, I have at least written an outline and notes. What are you going to do today to start achieving your goal?
- Forgive Yourself and Move On.
One of the last and final things that I do to become unstuck is to forgive myself. Sometimes we stay trapped in the past, which creates regret and dread. Every past event is a lesson and maybe even a blessing. As I mentioned before, blessings come wrapped in sandpaper. The race to success may be rough, but we are getting closer to the finish line.
I know that I am capable of much more than I sometimes give myself credit for and so are you!
A Few Guided Meditation YouTube Channels to Get You Started: